Dear Fresher class,
I know moving to university can be very overwhelming. You know that moment of absolute terror when your mum and dad drove away and you found yourself wondering ‘what in the world am I gonna eat for dinner?’. I’m here to tell you that life isn’t over. Homecooked meals, that’ll be a nice childhood memory, but hey… life moves on.
In the interest of helping you guys out, I’ve decided to sacrifice myself a little. Obviously, as a second-year student, I know exactly what is going on 100% of the time. I know how to get to the very intestines of each building on campus and arrive at each class at the perfect moment, not awkwardly early or embarrassingly late.
However, because I am a kind and caring person… when it came to induction class, I decided to help you all out a bit.
As there is not a single room big enough in the history/philosophy/all-underfunded-humanities-subjects-stuffed-into-ugliest-building-on-campus building, our history year-two induction lecture was moved to the bioscience building.
As second-year history majors, naturally we know all about the bioscience building. As a favor, we pretended to look glazed over and confused as we followed each other around in circles (think blind leading blind), first up one flight of stairs, then back down again. Eventually, we found a door that said the induction had been moved to -2.01. Of course, I knew exactly where and what -2.01 was, but I asked at the reception desk anyway and proceeded to lead a group of about 10 other students into a dimly lit lecture hall brimming with more students than I remember ever being in our course.
If you think sitting in a room full of people you don’t know is overwhelming, try bumping into every best buddy, awkward acquaintance, and cool-person-you-were-trying-to-talk-to-all-of-last-year at once (after three months of being away). However, as a second-year student, I wasn’t phased. Nothing phases the second-years.
Just as the guy next to me finished whispering ‘at least that is over, second-year really could only go up from here’, one of my favorite professors from last year stands at the front of the huge lecture theatre and announces:
‘If there are any second-years in this room, please leave. You know who you are… this is the first-year lecture’.
A wave of low chuckling tore across the theatre as we hunched or shoulders and let our cheeks brighten in faux embarrassment and hustled out of the lecture beneath the mocking eyes of one hundred and fifty or so first-year students.
Of course, it was all planned. Naturally. I figured it was the least us organised and put-together second-year students could do for all the confused little freshers. We figured you needed a little laugh in your day.
Can I just re-emphasise, it was all for you guys? #gooddeed0ftheweek, you know?
You are welcome.